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Resist! Be Strong – Eat More Salads!“The Man”, otherwise know as THEM (Titans of Hegemony and Evil Materialism), want to keep you down. One of the insidious ways in which they oppress the youth is through false foods. False foods make you feel lethargic and pack on flab: THEM wants you to be too sleepy and fat to fight! Real Foods are the only way to keep yourself awake and agile enough to combat THEM. Be strong – Eat Real Foods What are Real Foods?Real foods don't come from a box and don't require cooking or preparation instructions. Real foods are food the way nature made it, before THEM got their grimy capitalist hands on it. Although there are many Real Foods, we like to hold up as examples 3 particular Real Foods that are easy to find:
These Real Foods provide a variety of essentials to help you keep up the fight. We recommend getting together with your comrades to plan your next attacks against THEM: meet in groups of 3, and each one of you can bring one of the symbolic Real Foods to create a salad: the ultimate weapon against THEM! Know the CodeIt's easy to spot a fellow Vegarchist: just look for the carrot top! Just put a carrot, with top, in your hip pocket. The leafy green will be a sign for your comrades that you are ready for action. And if the authorities hassle you with questions ("What's that in your pocket?"), just tell them: "It's a carrot. I might get hungry later." If you suspect someone is posing as a fellow Vegarchist, just ask them: Are you ready to make salad? If they're a real Vegarchist, they should reply by saying, "All I need now is lettuce and a tomato." |